


It's Not Gross Shepard

by Emma_Trevelyan



Series: Alexandra Shepard's Modern Life [1]
Category: Mass Effect
Genre: Domestic, F/M, Fluff, Kaidan is Best Boyfriend, Modern AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-01
Updated: 2015-11-01
Packaged: 2018-04-29 08:28:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,266
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5121644
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Emma_Trevelyan/pseuds/Emma_Trevelyan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A modern AU, in which Kaidan is the best boyfriend.</p>
<p>For the 20 minute fanfic challenge</p>
<p>WARNING: This fic contains frank mentions of Fem!Shep's period, and if you can't handle that, then I'm sorry but please go away.</p>
            </blockquote>





	It's Not Gross Shepard

Alexandra Shepard was the most miserable she’d ever been. This was the worst period of all of them. She knew it. She had a pillow over her face, holding a heating pad to her lower abdomen. She groaned, loud enough to echo around her tiny apartment.

Ashley, her roommate, gave a low laugh; “Aw, sweetie, it’s not so bad.”

“This is literally the worst,” Shepard groaned. “I’m pretty sure I’m dying.”

“You’re not gonna die,” Ashley shot back, tipping her coffee cup into the sink. “Where’s Kaidan this weekend? I thought you two were going to get together.”

Shepard’s cramps eased slightly thinking of her slightly-older, very sexy boyfriend; needless to say it didn’t help much; “I told him I had some work to do this weekend and I would see him on Monday.”

Ash pulled her shoulder up in a half-shrug before crossing the living room to stare out the window; “Are you sure? Because I’m pretty sure that’s Kaidan’s car.”

“Can’t be,” Shepard pulled herself out of the oversized hoodie she wore. “He never comes over without calling.”

“Well, it’s a blue Shelby with the white stripes. I only know one person with that car.”

“Fuck! Are you serious?” Shepard leapt up from the couch.

“Yep, that’s Kaidan. And bless him, it looks like he brought pizza.”

Shepard paused for a moment at the thought of pizza; it was all she was craving right now. But she was a mess—her hair was oily as fuck, she hadn’t showered in two days, she wore her ugliest sloppiest sweats, and she’d stolen this hoodie from him (and swore she didn’t). Her apartment was kind of a wreck—he couldn’t see her like this.

Too late now, she supposed.

“Ash!! Help me!!”

“Oh, right!” Ashley sprung into action, gathering dishes and working her Tetris magic on the dishwasher.

Shepard ran into the bathroom and slammed the door behind her. She switched out her Diva Cup for a super-duper plus tampon, sprayed some coconut-scented dry shampoo through her hair, and switched out for yoga pants and a form-fitting long-sleeved black shirt. She tried to get her short, black bob to sit right, but unfortunately it looked like “just rolled out of bed” was the look she was going for tonight.

By the time Kaidan made it up the three floors, she looked at least moderately presentable, though her silvery eyes weren’t made up and she was fairly certain her deodorant was obvious.

“Hey, Kaidan!” she greeted a little too enthusiastically. “Didn’t expect you this weekend!!”

“Well, Shepard, I’ve learned that ‘I have to work this weekend’ is pretty much code for ‘I’m having a horrible period and am in desperate need of pizza.’ So I come bearing gifts.”

Kaidan grinned that gorgeous grin of his, quirking up the corner of his mouth and winking a whiskey-brown eye at her.

_God he is so gorgeous._

Although, she was slightly mortified. They hadn’t been dating that long, so she figured she would keep up the mystique for a bit, do that thing that girls do where they have no bodily functions whatsoever and wake up daisy-fresh and perfectly made up. Shepard thought of the dark hair that dotted her legs and blushed.

“I didn’t mean to embarrass you, Shepard,” Kaidan set the pizza and what looked like a bakery box on the counter. “If you want me to leave, I’ll go, if you really don’t want company. Consider the pizza a gift. But I really wanted to spent the weekend with you; I don’t get time off very often, you know.”

She felt a little twist in her chest; he’d taken the weekend off for her. She forgot about that. She grinned at him; “Well, that depends. What kind of pizza is that?”

Kaidan smirked and flipped the lid; “Onion, bacon and spinach with extra cheese from Mario’s. Oh, and a Tiramisu cupcake from that bakery around the corner from my office. I brought a red velvet one for Ash.”

Shepard’s mouth watered a little bit; “That’s my favorite type of pizza. And I love Tiramisu.”

“I know, Shepard, you told me,” Kaidan laughed, pulling out a six-pack of beer. “So I figured you could pick a movie and we’ll devour these carbs, ok?”

Her whole demeanor softened as he offered her a bottle; “You are the perfect man.”

“Good to know,” Kaidan’s voice dropped to a low register that sent curls of heat through her center. He pressed his lips to hers, and she shuddered—his lips were soft, but there was rough stubble surrounding them; the contrast was delicious. He always kissed her deep, like it was the last kiss he would ever give. It was pretty marvelous. He pulled away, his deep amber eyes lust-blown. His voice was rough, but teasing. “So you pick a movie while I think of a wedding date, hm?”

She giggled, which she never did, and went to the ottoman/storage cube where she hid all her movies and games. She pulled out a fairly generic comedy she loved and slid it into the DVD player. After about 20 minutes, she had her head against his lap, her heating pad across her stomach. She’d devoured the pizza and was currently working on savoring the cupcake. Kaidan was still working on his beer.

Shepard made a low, pleasurable noise when she bit into the cupcake; “Ok. Pretty sure I just had an orgasm. This is amazing.”

“Well, I aim to please,” Kaidan quipped, carding his dark, rough fingers through her hair. She purred low in her throat.

“Thanks for this, Kaidan,” she sighed, fully relaxing against him. “Sorry I’m so gross.”

Kaidan’s hand paused in her hair. She looked up at him, and his face was crumpled, like she’d hurt his feelings; “It’s not gross, Shepard. It’s natural. Any man who can’t handle it can go fuck himself.”

Shepard stiffened at his intense tone; “Sorry I offended you?”

“No, it’s ok, I just get pissy about cry-baby crap like that from other guys, and most girls I’ve met internalize that. It sucks,” Kaidan resumed playing with her hair, which drew out another pleasured moan. “Sorry.”

“I consider that to be very sexy, thank you very much,” Shepard sighed. “Feminism looks good on you.”

“I guess it’s my color,” Kaidan returned his attention to the movie, but Shepard was completely distracted.

She turned her head to nuzzle his leg, pressing a soft kiss to his hip; “Well, the pizza and beer and cupcake were just about the most amazing thing any guy has ever done for me. Allow me to return the favor.”

She licked her lips and ghosted a hand over his jeans to drive home her point. Kaidan’s head tipped back onto the sofa; he let out a low growl with was probably the sexiest noise she’d ever heard.

“Don’t feel obligated, Shepard,” he sighed, his voice low and dark. “I mean, I won’t turn you down, but I didn’t do this for a blow job, you know. I did it because I care.”

“Well,” she rolled, tossing her leg over his hips. “I want to because I care. I do give amazing head, after all.”

“That you do,” Kaidan pressed a kiss to her throat, his beer and the movie forgotten.

She arched into his touch, whipped her hips against him, drawing out another amazing sound.

“God, Shepard, you _minx_.”

“Well, I am trying to seduce you, Alenko.”

He ran his hands over her back, grasping at her with needy fingers; “I love you, Alex.”

“I love you too, Kaidan.”

**Author's Note:**

> The 20 minute fanfic challenge is simple--20 minutes on the clock, no editing. Just write. It's a great way to rid yourself of plot bunnies.
> 
> Now, all I want is a domestic, modern ME AU... I'm sorry. :


End file.
